If you have been experiencing difficulties getting through to God these days, it might be because he is trying his holy hand at hairdressing in Dalston. Who knew?
7/04/2008
Where is God when you need him
If you have been experiencing difficulties getting through to God these days, it might be because he is trying his holy hand at hairdressing in Dalston. Who knew?
Questions I never thought I would ask myself (but did)
What does one wear to a dinner party if the other guests are magicians?
Can I still eat that cheese if I take off all the green fuzz?
Why don't people answer my emails while I'm online?
Why does the weather not care about my deadlines?
Can I still eat that cheese if I take off all the green fuzz?
Why don't people answer my emails while I'm online?
Why does the weather not care about my deadlines?
7/01/2008
Things to do (that can't be planned for...)
Finding ducks in a swmming pool.
Falling asleep to the sound of the rain's pitter-patter on the roof above your head.
Getting lost.
Meeting a friendly fox on your way back home after a late night out.
Failing at something you should be good at.
Discovering that you can do something you never thought about (like putting your foot behind your head or solving riddles)
Forgetting your underwear in the morning and smiling secretly all day.
6/25/2008
A.
Have you ever stood by, helpless, while what you thought were the central features of your life just slipped, disappeared into the bottomless pit that lies beyond the limits of the earth as it was thought of before Columbus? Home, relationships, dreams and ambitions plummeting towards the open mouth of nothingness... The void is a scary thing, paradoxically full of emptiness and possibility. Quite a sight that! Some people would say it's one of life's formative experiences but I'm ready to bet all I've lost that the very same people pray they never have to go through it.
Of course, you'll try to clutch at straws, attempt to preserve whatever you can because these things define you, or so you think. Yet, aspirations and dreams are slippery little buggers. They will not be held and so down they go with the love that you had for people you didn't quite know and the desire you had for a future that didn't quite suit you and the hope you had for a life you couldn't quite envisage.
Only then, slack-jawed and bug-eyed, do you get to scream, shout and curse until your lungs are empty and burning. Only then do you get to cry until your eyes are raw and your whole body shakes with the pain of trying to keep what must be lost. Only then do you see that you have been stripped of protective layers of affection, belief and trust. Only then can you see that you're still there, blurry and sad, but still there.
Still there, faced with all that emptiness, all that potential. Still there, lighter of all these expectations; preempted regrets, really. Still there, capable of looking into the void and seeing that you will not fall after all. Still there, capable of knowing people you have not yet loved and finding a future suitable to your desires and envisaging a life filled with hope.
Your life, the aspirations and dreams that you make out of what you once thought was emptiness.
Of course, you'll try to clutch at straws, attempt to preserve whatever you can because these things define you, or so you think. Yet, aspirations and dreams are slippery little buggers. They will not be held and so down they go with the love that you had for people you didn't quite know and the desire you had for a future that didn't quite suit you and the hope you had for a life you couldn't quite envisage.
Only then, slack-jawed and bug-eyed, do you get to scream, shout and curse until your lungs are empty and burning. Only then do you get to cry until your eyes are raw and your whole body shakes with the pain of trying to keep what must be lost. Only then do you see that you have been stripped of protective layers of affection, belief and trust. Only then can you see that you're still there, blurry and sad, but still there.
Still there, faced with all that emptiness, all that potential. Still there, lighter of all these expectations; preempted regrets, really. Still there, capable of looking into the void and seeing that you will not fall after all. Still there, capable of knowing people you have not yet loved and finding a future suitable to your desires and envisaging a life filled with hope.
Your life, the aspirations and dreams that you make out of what you once thought was emptiness.
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